|
Student writing sample:
Global Warming is making our world
a dangerous place and is destroying the world. To Global warming is caused
by the green house gases.
Due to a global warming the ozone layer is depleting and the harmful ultraviolet rays are reaching the earth.
Also the ice in the mountains are is
melting.
To stop the causes of global warming we could start by Recycling. This is the process in which we could reuse
things like cardboard, plastic bottles and plastic
bags. We could also use both sides of piece of paper instead instead of binning it
after using only one side. We could stop global warming by reducing pollution caused by cars. We could walk or take public transport. We need to find more different types of energy. Use more solar, wind, and hydro electricity. We
also need to stop so much consumerism. When
we buy so much factories have to make it which causes more pollution and uses too much electricity.
As citizens: it is a right thing to do to stop polluting, buying too much, driving cars too much so that we can reduce the
effects of global warming.
Selects from a greater range of utility words (world, cardboard, bottles, electricity), descriptive words
(dangerous, plastic, both, one), subject-specific words (global warming, greenhouse gases, public transport,
solar, hydro electricity), academic words (process, reduce, effects) and words with multiple meanings
(place, side) with increased understanding of curricular concepts.
Level 3: Writes plurals (things, bags, sides), possessive pronouns (our), prepositional
phrases (by the, in which), regular verbs in continuous (is destroying, melting, using, driving)
and simple past tenses (no evidence), and irregular verbs in continuous (buying) and simple past tenses
(no evidence) with more control of agreement and tense.
Level 4: Uses negatives, irregular plurals, object pronouns, prepositions, regular verbs in past and future
continuous tenses, and irregular verbs in past and future continuous tenses.
Writes connected complex sentences and cohesive, well‑developed text with supporting detail (Due to a global warming the ozone layer is
depleting and the harmful ultraviolet rays are reaching the earth.).
Uses circumlocution and word substitution to add descriptions to writing and make better word choices (Also the ice in the mountains = glaciers,
we buy so much = goods, packaging.).
Writes expository and narrative texts with knowledge of culturally appropriate forms and styles (To stop the causes of global warming we
could start by Recycling.).
Connects ideas in a three-paragraph narrative using transition words (also, when, as) and subordinate conjunctions
(after, so that).
Approaching Level 4: Edits for capitalization of proper nouns (no evidence), apostrophes (no evidence),
quotation marks (no evidence), hyphens (no evidence), dashes (no evidence), commas (,),
regular spelling (factories), irregular spelling, spelling of homophones and homonyms (piece, wind, right),
subject–verb agreement (is, are is), word choice (consumerism) and addition of supporting details (We
could stop global warming by reducing pollution caused by cars.).
|